KING OF NEW YORK HACKS

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Sunday, July 6, 2008

Going to the Moon

I got hailed down a side street in Flushing by a mechanic named Hector (saw the name on his shirt ) who said to me " it's too fucking hot to walk bro " I agreed with him , and then he noticed the T.V. screen that's in most cabs now and said " What the fuck is this yo ? I get T.V. in a cab now ? Damn man, they be trying some stupid shit all the time !! I haven't been in a cab in a while yo! " I agreed again , and then proceeded to tell him how all cabs in NYC will be painted green over the next few years and his response was , " Green ?? New York City is Yellow cabs son, why they be fucking with everything" I was beginning to think Hector would be a great Commissioner for the Taxi Limo Commission. I was sure if he was, he wouldn't be fucking with anything and let us drivers do our jobs. It was then that I told him that they are going to install moonroofs in some of the Taxi's so people can look up as we drive through the city. He was not happy about this , Hector proceeded to give his outlook on the matter, with a puzzled look and raising his voice he said "Why ?!? You going to the fucking moon?...fuckin' outer space yo ? Shiiiiiiittttt, that would cost like Five G's !! You'd only have to work a few days a year bro !!.........that's if you good at it. " I thought for a moment about this, a few days a year, Five G a trip, checking out the moon, wondering as Hector said "only if I'm good at it"...would I be ?? Does this mean new training? That was some profound thought. As I pulled up to his destination he tipped me 2 bucks and said " be chill bro " ...I replied " not today bro , too fucking hot yo " . Hector smiled and said "yeah, fucking moon" as he walked away and I hit the gas looking for the next fare....maybe to the moon one day.

4 comments:

  1. I'd love to know why you are messing with people's heads telling them things like taxis will be painted green and will have moon roofs installed. None of that is true.

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  2. Ah my friend , these are not untruths...Every taxi that expires by law must be painted green to return to the streets as well a being a hybrid, and yes they are experimenting with a number of cabs installing moon roofs to see if the tourists and customers prefer them over the bulky ad sign that now exists. All part of Bloombergs plan for a "Green" environment friendly city. True stuff brother ,sometimes I do mess with people's heads but not in this instance , which is why I am The King of New York Hacks.You can look it up on the TLC website. Thanks for questioning me, hope you spread the truth on what will happen now.Cheers mate.

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  3. you tell him King !! That mofo is a jester !!! Cabs are gonna be green, and all hybrids , not to mention that they track all the money we make now including the $65 I spent on gas last night !!! At least we got a job though !! I only took home $26 the other night...for 12 hours...if we don't work all week we broke , they don't realize what we go through !!

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  4. What are the cab rates in NYC now? $1.75 a mile? Let's see, the moon is 240,000 miles away, so that would translate into a $420,000 fare (plus tip). And it it turns out to be a round trip, hey, that's would be even better!

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